I remember it so clearly, but what I thought I knew the meaning to seems to be so lost now. A friend of mine from NYU once said to me something along the lines of ‘economically speaking the value of what we produce lies directly in proportion to our salaries, following this if there lies little value in what you are producing expect to see this reflected in the salary which you receive.’ These words have never left me.
Fast forward two or three years later now and I am a $125/month Peace Corps Volunteer in Kyrgyzstan asking myself what is the value of my work. Moreover I cannot help but ponder the thought that is this $125/month salary the expected future contribution of my students to society? Logically speaking in that I am receiving $125/month to educate these students it would seem to make economic sense that society would expect these students to financially contribute an average of $125 to society themselves. I mean, if society had high economic expectations from my students that would be reflected in the investment which were put into the students (which would then exhibit influence in my salary) 🙂 I’m doing more than babbling now but these have been some issues which have been stinging my conscious recently…I mean if society itself has such low expectations from these students then why should I have such high ones? Even though I know that society is indiscreetly telling me to not expect anything from my community how could I not have expectations? How could I not have expectations when I am told for the first time in my life that I have become someone’s role model? I’ll tell you how – because I am young and foolish…
My salary is a reflection of reality but having someone tell you that you are their role model is something that cannot be calculated. But I digress…the reality is that no matter how much I work here, how much effort I pour into what I do 90% of my work will be in vain. So why continue? Why continue to try to understand the plight which the locals here are in? Why move from my comfortable surroundings to this difficult country? Why would I give up the privileges I was born with to have work that will most likely have such little use.
Hope. Guilty Conscious Syndrome. That ‘I Want to Save the World Feeling.’ – all have something to do with it. Society has a $125/month expectation from the students who I work with but as a volunteer here is it not simply my duty to raise the bar of what should be expected? In that my role here is to also show others the ability and capability of my community can I do anything less than give it my all? These words sound nice when written down but what can I do to really help? And even more is it right to have these ideas of making higher expectations?
According to the World Happiness Survey Kyrgyzstan is happier than most countries including both America and Korea. According to the survey man simply finds more pleasure in life in Kyrgyzstan than in most countries. Here the facilities work horribly, blackouts are frequent but if man is happy who am I to judge. It’s funny how ironic the whole thing about people being happier here sounds. I read this happiness survey and think about how America must have been in the 1930’s (people generally say that Kyrgyzstan is eighty years behind America technologically). I wonder if people were happier in America back then…
A post without a specific focus – but I guess one is not necessary either…
until next time…
potato tilling, grass cutting, cold water bathing andrew
Woori Kyrgyz 